Monday, December 1, 2008

I thought it was allergies but it snot!

OH MY GOD...ya'll! I am sick. Sick. SICK! And I friggin hate it.

First of all...Friday night, we had a jolly 'ole time. Megan and Eric, my brothers and the blond girls came over. If you don't know who the blond girls are...think about the Jr. Brides maid and flower girl in my wedding. Yeah. THOSE blond girls. Who are now 18 and 16, long legged and beautiful with cascades of long blond hair. For some reason, luckily, they still want to hang out with me every once in a while. I am so old.... Here are some pics of blond girls then and now..
Emily is the Flower girl, Susan is the Jr. Brides Maid
This is Susan now..she's a freshman in college
Emily now..she is a Sophomore in high school
Did I mention how old I feel?

And Megan's friend, Melissa came over too. After everyone left, Melissa gets it in her head that we-meaning Megan and Me-should go to a bar. This was after Megan and I had polished off a couple bottles of wine. I am pretty sure my already alcohol-induced buzz contributed to my decision to say YES! let us go to a bar, it will be fun! Besides, we are out of wine..and PEOPLE...I need more wine. Now..I haven't been to a bar for the sole purpose of getting shit faced in years. YEARS! And even longer without my husband in tow to keep my drunk ass in check. So, the girls and I decide that we will go to the local 'Round the Corner Pub in New Pal. Two reasons, ONE-it's fairly close to my just outside of New Pal house and TWO-Greg was working, as in on duty...combing the streets of New Pal for gang bangers, robbers, drunks and the like. SO, if we all got a little to drunk to drive, he could come get us. Thank God we have officer Evans..who works the late shift! He is my hero.

Anyway, we went to the bar, which was a little smoky..and guys! I am allergic to smoke! But yeah, I sucked it up and dealt with it, because we were grown up girls, going to a pub-all by ourselves. and it was going to be fun! Besides, visions of buttery nipples, redheaded sluts and tequila danced in our heads. And it wasn't that smokey. Who am I to let a little thing like a smoke allergy keep me from all that alcoholic goodness? We ran into old friends, we did our shots..complete with toasts.. We became Whoo girls (obscure How I met your mother reference) And I was home, in bed....alone, sorry to two am.

SO Saturday, I woke up...Sinuses burning all to hell. It was miserable but I thought it was the consequences of a late night combined with a smokey bar. It was a rude reminder of why I quit going to the bars in the first place. THE SMOKE. I can't handle the smoke. It makes me sick and stuff. My nose burns, my eyes burn and swell, I don't really like coming home smelling like an ashtray and my throat feels all raw. When I am in an enclosed room where clouds of smoke hang in the air, my lungs say..."aw... wtf? WE give up" and they start to close up. Which means a puff or two from ye 'ole albuterol inhaler. So you can imagine why I thought this sickness was allergies.

What does recovering from what I think is an allergy make me do? I decide that dragging out my Christmas decorations, in all their dusty glory, would be excellent and fun. Especially when I am already having sinus trouble because dust that has been gathering on the boxes of the Christmas stuff for over a year would definitely be the best thing for my-what I thought was an allergy. Megan comes over and we start putting up the Christmas tree and all the decorations. My bestie from the north came by..Tiffany! (who is having a rough time, so please-all you praying people-say a little pray for her) By the time she left, I was doubled over in pain and pressure. My face felt like it was going to explode. My left eye started to swell shut. Oh and hello. Fever at 102. Which sucks because nothing makes you feel worse than having a stuffed up head AND a fever. Nothing I tell you.

I got exactly 2 hours of sleep Saturday night. I couldn't lay down or else my face felt like snot would burst through my cheeks and fore head. I could sit for very long because I felt like I was going to puke from all the over-the-counter meds I kept shoving down my throat in effort to get some much needed relief. Plus, I am not even supposed to take said over-the-counter cold meds with my thyroid medicine..something about causing excess iodine (which I am also allergic to) and heart palpitations. But WHATEVER...I will take that over the stuffiness and fever. they suck worse. Yesterday wasn't much better either and my kids were so friggin needy...what, with their "I'm hungry. We need sustenance" cries. KIDS! Your mother is sick and that takes precedence over your empty because you have not eaten since last night stomachs. I don't care if you are growing and trying to make yourselves into healthy adults, I am in my head feels eleventy feet thick. SICK I tell you. But I did what every self respecting mother does when she is sick..I set cereal, bread, peanut butter and Jelly and bananas on the table and told my 7 and 5 year old children to fend for themselves until Daddy gets up. HA..who says I am not mother of the year!

And now I know... I do not have allergies. I have a cold, with a full blown sinus infection. No, I haven't been to the doctor but I get sinus infections every year and only once have they required a trip to the emergency room. I will wait it out..because I know what the docs will say...Sinus infections are mostly caused by viruses, there is nothing they can give me that will actually help and I just need to "let it run it's course"! Oh and they will chastise me for my elevated blood pressure because I took over-the-counter meds when I am on thyroid medicine. Did I mention excess Iodine and heart palpitations? Yeah, apparently it elevates your blood pressure too. So they will tell me to stop taking anything at all that actually helps and try to breath over steam a few times a day. Easy for them to say, they don't have to watch a bunch of babies and toddlers today. Children who will also demand my attention, diaper changes, and food. AND that is damn near impossible to do when your head is eleventy feet thick...

THAT is why I thought it was allergies but it's not.


1 comment:

Becky and Scott said...

YIKES!!! I'm so sorry that you are soooo sick!!! :( Makes me sad....I hope you get better soon!

PS Why does it look like my dress is falling off!?!?!?!?!?