This will be my second time writing this...I wrote this yesterday, but then.BAM. My internet screwed up...and I lost it. IT pissed me off so much that I gave up trying to rewrite it for the day...and that leads me to here.
For the last two days, I have been pretty good about my eating. All good stuff, most of the time. I did have one slice of my homemade bread..because it just smelled SO DARN GOOD. But I did pay for it, with stomach cramps later on. Which furthers my suspicion that I have a wheat issue. And it totally sucks. There is so much good food that has wheat in it and I don't really want to not eat it. SO that kind of has me depressed. I mean...it's feel good, or eat the good stuff. I can't have both and it's sort of unfair. I am not standing in the front yard with my hands on my face screaming "WHY ME" or anything, but I am just a little bummed about it. ALSO...I have not purchased any Diet Pepsi since I started this....and aside from drinking some sort of diet drink when I am out and about, I have dramatically decreased my intake of aspartame. I don't even miss it...ok, that's sort of a lie...I do miss it, just a little. But I don't think of it when I first wake up...not everyday anyway. So...Be gone, Diet Pepsi. You are full of poison and things not so good for me. And although, you taste wonderfully, you are DEAD TO ME! Here is your Dear John letter:
Dear Diet Pepsi,
Don't be sad. We have had 10 good years together...and those were some of the best years of my life. I started drinking you when the bridal shop lady wanted to order my wedding dress in a size 8. A FRIGGIN SIZE 8! I, being a stupid young girl, refused to pay for the dress unless she ordered a 6. And since I couldn't eat any less food then I already was, I traded in your brother Pepsi for you. Yeah..that's right, I was with your brother first...call me a whore if you need to.
Our love affair began slowly. My first impressions of you...were a little bitter. You left a bad taste in my mouth. I was determined, however, to make it work and soon you were my constant companion. We met for breakfast, lunch and dinner and you soon replaced all of my other beverage friends. AND...we were happy. I fit in that size 6 dress and even had to have it taken in a little. I know that you helped me do that. I am so very thankful.
We had a rough times too. Like when I found out I was pregnant with my first born and you were jealous. Just being around you made me sick. Your smell. your taste. You made my stomach hurt and that made me hate you for a while. I left you.....for your brother...who was much kinder to my morning sickness. You hated me for it but I did what I had to do...just know that your brother probably contributed to the amount of weight I gained.
Our separation was short lived. Soon after the birth of my son, I began to crave you. And it wasn't long until I was drinking you and only you once again. You became my life. You completed my day. I drank you in the morning, I always had a bottle of you in the car and you were my last drink before bed. We were best friends, lovers even. And when I became pregnant with my daughter, you were far more understanding. You stood by me while I was pregnant. I continued to drink you daily, even though I knew I shouldn't have. You were SOOOOO good to me then. I loved you like I have never loved you. Even in the delivery room, after Claire was born, you were the first drink I asked for.
I know that I sprung this break up on you suddenly....it's not you, it's me. I am just not happy with this toxic relationship anymore. You are poison to my body...and even though I love you..GOD I LOVE YOU, I cannot allow this to continue. Please stop calling me. I have moved on...and not to your brother either. I am with your cousin, Tea now. Tea loves me. Tea treats me right...Tea has good antioxidants...you can't offer that. Tea and I are running away together.
I am sure we will see each other from time to time. At friends houses, in restaurants, at BBQ's. And will not be a snob and act like I never knew you. I will drink you occasionally, just for old times sake. But never again will you have the hold on me that you used to.
Good bye Diet Pepsi....I have moved on! Don't Cry. I am sad about it too. I will sit around all day listening to Release Me by Wilson Phillips and a bunch of other mushy lost love songs...but I am confident in my decision...no matter how much it hurts. And you will move on too...there are plenty of people that still love you. Good bye Diet Pepsi , Good bye!
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